Friday, August 29, 2008

What's wrong?

I don't know what's wrong with me these days.

At one moment I can be laughing non-stop for no reason (and leave others with many many question marks on their face), and then the next second I can be really moody and feel like wanna cry or throw my pillows everywhere. Sometimes I even feel like shouting or biting people (lolz?).

Dont't tell me it's because of freaking pms. EEee wtf
Seriously the feeling when girls are on pms is really undescribable, guys will never ever understand that feeling no matter what.

I guess I really needa stop emoing d. Things gonna get better one day. I hope. =)

*I really miss her.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Another disappointment.

I didn't want my blog to be so emo-ish.
But it seems like I'm writing a lot of emo entries. Aiksss...

Perhaps, you have forgotten about your promise.
Or perhaps, you thought that I have forgotten about it?
THREE disappointment today. Three in total.
Are you really that forgetful, or maybe it's just the levity in you?
I knew it since the very beginning. But still, I'm a bit disappointed, not that I wanted all these that badly, it's just that I'm now starting to lose the confidence.

All I want is just a little bit more concern from you. You didn't even bother to show me your concern when I was sick.

Perhaps, what you want is just -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------. (11 words in total. You fill in the blanks yourself hahahahaaas make full use of your own imagination =P)

Still, I hope I'm making the right decision. Cheers! =)

I lie awake at night
See things in black and white
I only got you inside my mind
You know you have made me blind

I lie awake and pray
That you will look my way
I have all this longing in my heart
I knew it right from the start

Oh my pretty pretty boy
I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside
Make me stay
Right beside you

I used to write your name
And put it in a frame
And sometimes I think I hear you call
Right from my bedroom wall

You stay a little while
And touch me with your smile
And what can I say to make you mine
To reach out for you in time

Oh my pretty pretty boy
I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy
I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside
Make me stay
Right beside you

Oh pretty boy
pretty boy
pretty boy
Say you love me too

Oh my pretty pretty boy
I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside
Make me stay, ooo right beside you.

*p/s: This is my blog. I have the rights to write what I want to write. It's just a place for me to express my feelings, share the sad and happy moments of my life with my readers. Just click on the "X" on the right hand side on top if you don't like my blog. And please don't approach me and ask who am I talking about in my blog. If I wanna tell, I will tell. AND also please do not assume people that I mention in my blog is you and then start going around and ask what's wrong. You are not me, you won't know who am I refering to. So please don't keh gao :)

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Woolala Lee Chong Wei failed to get the gold medal

Just saying without an action is plainly useless.
Prove it to me if you really mean it. So that I will have faith in you.
And don't ever promise me if you are not yet sure whether you can do it or not and then in the end you forget about the promise.
You know I hate being lied. I would gradually lose the confidence in you one day.

I hope I'm making the right decision :'(

*p/s: I super duper uber cooper hate her. What's the point of her doing all these? Can't she just let the world be peaceful?

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Updates, finally!

Life hasn't been really great these days.
If I were given a chance, I would probably wanna go back to my original life.

A few of my Besties, a bunch of kisiao friends, shopping, dancing, performing, college, those moments we spent to paint our nails when lecturers were teaching, the crazy things we did at the cafeteria and the craps we talked about during and after classes, those time that we actually wanted to discuss about our group assignments and that we ended up with lots of lame jokes and craps and laughters, those time that we would start doing our assignments or revision at the eleventh hour when assignments were gonna due or exams were around the corner, those make-up tips that we would never mind sharing, those moments we spent in the changing room trying out new clothes but could hardly purchase them, the time where we would always carry cameras with us all the time and take pictures of ourselves whenever there's a mirror or probably just plainly a reflection of smooth surfaces, the gossips that we would never stop gossiping about, the time where we went shopping together and did stupid and silly things without having taking care of our own image, those moments where we laugh out loud and shout when we were happy or when someone tells a funny joke, those moments where we could chat for few hours just for nothing, and also some of the time where we went swimming together and talked about our future plans, the routine that I hardly miss every week when there were my jazz and belly dancing class, the passion for performing and the joyfulness when getting a chance to perform, the crazy moments whenever we had our dance rehearsals and the tension whenever performing date was around the corner, those time when I had my own room and I could have my own personal time where I could do anything that I like such as taking my own sweet time painting my nails for 2 hours and waiting for them to dry up till I fall asleep and then ended up my nails were a mess after I wake up and that I had to repaint them, those time that I could listen to some soft musics before I sleep, those time when I could really sleep soundly and peacefully without having any disturbance, those time where I could spend my own money that I earned on the things that I had been longing for, those time when I could see and talk to my parents everyday, those time that I did not need to do any of the housework except of cleaning my own room though I never really did that (=P), those time that I did not need to worry what to eat every morning when I wake up, those time where I hated instant noodles very much, those time where I had plenty plenty plenty of chocolates stocked up at home, those time that I had to chase over a cockroach that occasionally appear at my drawer where I kept my undergarments (!!), those time that I did not need to worry how much the price of petrol has gone up, those time where I had to sit in front of the TV everyday to watch my favourite TV series/movies/reality shows, those time that I had to pay my dentist a visit every month or two to tighten my braces....

and lots lots more that I couldn't really recall edi, wtf

I know it's impossible, it's not gonna happen anyway. So that is why I'm trying really hard to adapt myself into this new environment. (I'm not those whose adaptivity is very low kind of person, in fact.)

Lucky to say, I have a really really good uncle, cousins and new friends (and of course THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE is included, too) who have never hesitated to make me feel happier and happier each day from the day I was forced to move to this new place.

I am glad that I am able to face this obstacle optimisticly, though at times I was a bit depressed when I am not in good mood. (aiya girls are like that every once in a month la, so it's nothing special also right)

But not too pesimistic lah,
actually my life hasn't been really bad, either.

'Cause I got the chance to try out a lot of things that I had not tried before this.

-I sat on a motorcycle and travel along the town for the first time. (except for when I was like at the age of 2 or 3 when my grandpa who has passed away like many many years ago fetched me go kai kai =P and I don't even remember how it feels to sit on a motorcycle)

-I go for fishing!

-I caught a fish (it was a stingray tim!) for the very first time!

-I do all the housework all on my own everyday after coming back from college (sweeping and mopping the floor, wash & dry & fold the clothes and then distribute all of them to each person's room, cook RICE??, do the washing, yiu i hate washing plates the most! some of them will help occasionally, only when their mood good lah -.-zz) and in fact I don't mind doing all these because I'm the only girl at home, can't even rely on the guys, damn, but I just don't feel their appreciation, like because I'm the only girl at home SO I AM SUPPOSED TO DO ALL THE HOUSEWORK BECAUSE THAT'S A GIRL'S JOB AND DUTY AND RESPONSIBILTY TO ENSURE EVERYTHING AT HOME IS CLEAN AND TIDY, AND IT'S LIKE NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS LIKE THAT, AND THEN SHOW ME FACES WHEN I ASKED TO HELP TO DO THE WASHING ONCE, and that makes me feel like no point of doing all these, now I feel guilty for my mom and kakak 'cause I used to only help out when I was free.

-I watch midnight shows in the cinema (too bad the POPCORNS here aren't as good as the one they have in GSC Sunway Pyramid!)

-I go to the beach at the middle of the night!! I love beach!! (just like how much I like blue loh)

-I can hang out and lepak outside till very very late!

-I play mahjong like a few times a week until I've become so pro as compared to last time (I was very noob)

-I eat instant noodles like once in 2 or 3 days. EEee

-I sleep like very very very very less as compared to last time.

-I only go to bed in the morning everytime when there's no classes and even when there'll be classes to attend I would also sleep really late (totally different as compared to last time cos I used to go to bed before 11 when I have got classes to attend. Sleep WAS my first priority because that's the secret to keep us girls pretty and refresh all the time, and dancing WAS my second priority as it is my passion, however, sad to say that these two are no longer my priority edi. zzz) and even now it's like already 8.30 in the morning and I haven't slept! wtf

-I have supper like almost everyday? (What The Fish!? If it was last time, I wouldn't eat anything after 8pm, no matter how hungry I was.) I am gaining weight damn!

-I have not been for shopping like many months edi.. (eeEE) But still my money-spending rate is high! Maybe because of food? And that damn petrol is making me pokkai!

-I straightened my hair like 2 weeks ago? My ass was like gonna burst (KABOOOM!) sitting in the salon for more than 5 hours! (Show you guys my pic next time!)

-I had my first _________. (Fill in the blanks/ Isikan tempat kosong) hahaha

*woahhh don't tell me you are gonna write all the happenings in this one month in one entry!? This is gonna be really long post man! Do you think I'm gonna read everything that you wrote? nah I'm gonna skip those long long paragraph and just only go through some of the sentences!*

waa.. I think this is the longest entry ever that consists only words and still I've a lot more to blog about wor.
How ah? I think if I continue writing no one is gonna continue reading!
So should I just stop here???

yeah yeah I need some sleep too I guess!